Things you'll never hear: part II

This week from Forrest Gump!

You know what Jennay? I've had quite enough of your indecision.

Mama always told me if ya want your kid in a good school, play the schoolteacher like a ukulele. 

Mama always told me, if you want to make money in the market, ya gotta play the brockage houses like a ukulele. 

Bubba: I'm gone be okay Forrest, I'm gone be okay.
Forrest: no you won't. You gone die.

I named by boat WETDREAM. After Jennay. 

If only mama respected my intellectual capacity. 

Every one was very nice at the army. Exept private Fischer. Stupid private Fischer.

Momma always said I should have been played by John Goodman.

Is there something obviously hilarious that we missed? Give suggestions/reprimand us in the comments!

Things you will never hear

Introducing a new segment called "Things you'll never hear". This week, from Hulk hogan! Enjoy, I guess.

"Our trip to Sicily was Fabulous!" Or for that matter, "fabulous!"

"No, I'm never going to dye my hair. Are you crazy!?" Or, assuming he is not a hypocrite, "Are you crazy!?!"

"I'll need to think about that"

"The problem with America is...."

"But what I really like about her is her personality"

"Oh, sorry, I'm busy that day. I have my meeting with the Dali lama." Or for that matter, "Oh, sorry"

"Acai berries"

"If I regret anything in my life, its...."

"You know where's nice? France. I think I'll move there and start a vinyard"

 "What do you mean in not heavy enough to go on this ride!?!"

"Please, show some class guys"

If there's one thing I hate, it's...
A)steroid users
B)fake sports
C)the  corruption of the church

"If only there weren't so many good for nothing rednecks terrorizing the US economy!"


*no offense hulk